Random

Its 12:18 a.m. I am waiting for Kaden to fall back asleep so I can stick his cannula up his nose (again). Zay woke up around 11 with a fever so getting him up out of bed to give him a nebulizer woke up Kaden who then became a little punk. Seriously that boy has quiet the attitude. He's also a cup thief. If they dont fall back asleep soon I will give up.

I can't remember what I was going to blog about. So here's some randomness.

Life is good.

Warm weather is almost here. I love "Spring Forward" even though it means missing an hour of sleep - it also means that at 7 p.m., it was still light out. Love love love that. Started running again. My first motivation is that the boys are getting heavier and I need to be fit. My back hasn't hurt since I started running. I see this as a necessity.

Speaking of love, I love our church. Grace Haven South Main blended church which soon will have a new name - they are awesome. I love my new friends from South Main. I am going with a mom there to another special needs group - Joni and Friends - on Thursday. I am becoming a special needs group, groupie, I think.

The boys have been so healthy up until Friday. They have snotty noses. Which is typical of 3 year olds, I know. I haven't given a neb in so long it took me 15 minutes to find the stinking nebulizer tonight (Buried under some toys.) I feel that is a good problem to have.

Morgann has the a fore mentioned cold as well. She also has a Teddy Bear Tea Pajama party at school tomorrow. Pajama day! What fun. She is such a cool kid. I know I have said that before, but seriously, she just rocks. She is about 4 chapters away from finishing reading her Children's Bible all on her own. I should learn from her example. She reads her Bible EVERY night before bed.

The boys room just got quiet. Dare I go in there? Kaden probably could use oxygen with that stuffy nose....Isaiah's oxygen sats are also not remarkable. Bleh. He really seems to have some minimal congestion and a fever. His ear drums look perfect. Probably a virus I guess. Alright, gonna sneak in and see if I can settle them down then settle myself down to sleep as well.

seven

Happy Birthday to my sweet seven year old Morgann! What a joy these past seven years have been. We are so blessed to have such a sweet, thoughtful, inquisitive, caring, goofy little girl.

(Our cool dolphin cutlery!)
(Decorating fish bread to make mini pizzas!)
(Dolphin Goodie boxes)

To celebrate, my friend Margie and I threw a super duper dolphin birthday bash. It was a flippin' success! (Flippin...flipper....dolphins...get it? Okay bad joke) My mom and dad were able to be here to celebrate with us. Thanks to everyone who came to celebrate with our sweet seven year old!

(Opening a dolphin blanket from MeMaw and Poppie)

School

My little boys started school on Tuesday.

Public school.

With an EIP. In a classroom. Without me.

Being a mom of kids with some unique needs, I have been stretched in ways that I am not so comfortable being stretched.

Like sending my sweet, precious, innocent little boys to government school.

But in the end, it came down what was best for my kids. And it does not quite line up with my political and faith beliefs. (I may have said in the past that my children would attend public school over my dead body. Alas, never say never.)

Two days in and my little men love it. They are totally beaming when I pick them up. And not because they see me - they are too busy looking around and being happy.

I feel a bit bad for the school. I refuse to let them: contact our doctor, have access to most health records, let the health dept have info, ect. I cant quite get over all my distrust. Maybe later. But for now, this is a big step for me.

In the end, its not about me. Its about my guys. Its time for them to go to school. I am going to have to let down a few of my guards and let my kids go a little bit. They are getting a ton of therapy, in a classroom specific for kids with hearing loss, and most importantly, they seem to love it.

Broken

For Christmas we received a gift. It was a coffee creamer and sugar set. When it arrived. It was broken. At first, I sadly thought: "What a waste! I am going to have to throw it away." Then I decided to try to glue it back together. With some super glue (that is banned in California because it may cause one to grow a third eyeball) I started to glue it back together. In about 30 minutes I was done. Good as, well, almost good as new! My set now sits on the butcher block in the kitchen. The sugar bowl filled with sugar. It is doing what it is designed to do. Fulfilling its purpose.

As I was gluing, I started to ponder God, brokenness, the boys, and myself. God designed the boys. He designed you and me. And yet we all are a bit broken. During the boys their first year of life, they have a few scars reminding us that they are broken and needing fixed. Scars that saved their lives. God allowed the boys to be scarred. He allows bad things to happen to us. I think we spend too much time pondering "why"...when the answer isn't meant to be revealed to us right away. But what I do know is that these two little boys have touched so many lives. Just today, I brought them into a room, and a woman there, who was looking a bit downcast, lit up when she saw them. Her demeanor totally changed. That is just a tiny insignificant example.

I guess what it boils down to - how do respond to brokenness. .Our first response, we can say: what a waste. And live a life void of purpose.

We can try to pick up the pieces but live life half broken and ashamed that we aren't perfect.

Or we can use our scars, broken pieces, and imperfections for God's glory. Each scar tells a story. A lesson in living. We still have a great purpose and perhaps even a greater purpose and responsibility. The scars of Jesus after he died on the cross - in our place - for all the nasty, gross things we have done here on the earth - tells us how much He loves us. It convinced Thomas to believe. And reminds us of the great sacrifice He made.


Here are the stories behind some of the boy's scars, for the curious...
The first one, is Isaiah. Its a scar from an intraosseous catheter. You see, Isaiah had aspirated. And a not so wonderful night nurse didn't take this mom here seriously that I thought Isaiah was seriously sick. By morning, it was apparent he was in critical conditions. And severely dehydrated. And we couldn't get IV access. So they basically took a needle and stuck it into his leg bone and were able to infuse some fluids. Enough that we were able to get an IV and get strong antibiotics running in a few hours. Unfortunately it also infiltrated quickly, swelling his leg and leaving a scar. But that whole incident taught me a lot. The second is a scar from an infiltrated IV of Kaden's: another lesson for this mom: check IV's hourly even if the nurse does not. The third is Kaden's G-tube. It sustained Kaden and his life for over a year. I can't say what the future holds for my scarred children, or for my scar-less Morgann, but I have faith that God will use those scars, trials, delays, and hardships and make something beautiful out of it. Actually I can say with certainty, He already did.

NH primary

Today is the NH primary. I voted for my favorite candidate based upon I truly support their beliefs.
But here is why I didn't vote for the following. Yes some are superficial but here is the honest truth. Don't be too offended :)

Newt Gingrich: I won't vote for someone with an amphibian name, sorry. Plus the cheating thing.
Jon Huntsman: in his tv ad he says: "Americans are being screwed." yeh didn't like my 6 year old asking "why are we being screwed? What is screwed?"
Romney: former Mass governor, enough said. But his hair creeps me out too.
Perry: HPV vaccine mandate. Please don't force me to vaccinate my kid against a STD because there are still a million other STD's out there...oh and too many girls have died due to the vaccine than my comfort level allows.

So that's how you don't get a vote in Abbey land.

MoMo

Interview with Morgann, age 6 and 10 mo. (almost 7...sigh...)

What is your favorite show: Wild Kratts

What is your favorite thing at school: Probably learning our about our senses

What is your favorite food: Crackers

What do you want to be when you grow up: Veterinarian

Favorite Christmas present: Paper doll things

What do you think about church: I like doing the little Bible craft thing

What do you think about your brothers: Um, okay. I like them when they laugh and stuff. I dont want any more questions.

Fighter

K means Fighter. Though we did not name our little man, his name was rightly chosen.

He is one spunky monkey. And very opinionated. A little man of few words. He only speaks when its really necessary. GO! ALL DONE! are his two most uttered words.

He is VERY attached to his pacifier, whom we call Mr. Binks. However, our little man is three and even though his teeth already have suffered a bit of damage due to Mr. Binks, its time for Mr. Binks to start leaving. He uses binks mostly as a chew toy.

Kids with feeding tubes are typically encouraged to use a pacifier since oral stimulation typically ceases due to no longer eating by mouth. However, Kaden, eats and drinks by mouth but still wants to be chewing/sucking on things most of the day. Which developmentally speaking, is appropriate because of his delays.

We have tried a few replacements: Chew Tubes, Teethers shaped similar to pacifers. To which he has had no interest.

Then he got a Little People toy for Christmas. Her name is Maggie. Maggie is now K's best friend. Its only been a few days but he has taken quite an attachment to Maggie. So much so, he no longer is using Mr. Binks during the day.

So I think we have a new milestone. And I think soon Mr. Binks will be able to go away at night as well.